Software Maestro recently published a parody of a Daily Stand-up with Jar Jar Binks as Scrum Master. In the excerpt below, a "hog" reports to the Scrum Master:
“All of these Scrum meetings seem to use a lot of valuable time that I could use to discuss issues with my team members directly. I feel if we had more serious meetings to talk about the interfaces and data-flow that would be helpful. Also I think having concrete specifications and tangible goals would be handy."
If the "hog" had taken any time to understand Scrum, he would know that the Daily Stand-ups save more time than they waste by bringing to the surface—daily—issues that might not be known for months in other environments. Scrum insists on tangible goals, concrete specifications, and just-in-time targeted meetings on specific issues.
"Why do we even have these Scrum meetings in person? ...How much information can you really get in 1 minute of speech that you couldn’t get out of a 2 line email?"
Again, anyone who understands Scrum knows that the transparency forced by the Daily Stand-ups cannot be manufactured by e-mail, web-forms, or even video conferencing. Team players look into each others eyes and hold each other accountable. That's what makes Scrum work.
The parody also questions why a Scrum Master is required. The Scrum Master has two primary roles: (1) to remove obstacles that are preventing the team from delivering and (2) to enforce the process—essentially teaching the team about transparency and accountability.
The Scrum Master in the parody was Jar Jar Binks.
“Meesah say, we are too busy sprinting to discuss such things. Scrum is Hard. We appreciate yousa sacrifice. Stay the course.”
One need only read these words to see the real problem. What the "hog" needed was a Scrum Master that knew something about Scrum.
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